Highs and Lows

I hate highs and lows.
High= excitement about anything, being obliviously happy and content.
Lows=depression, sadness, hopeless despair.

I hate highs because the only place to go once you've reached them is down, and its inevitable. No plateau, no middle ground, no consistency. Down you'll plummet. Depending on the occasion or cause of the trip up you will either continue falling until you are in utter despair or your shirt will get caught by the "lets tell everyone and everything to fuck off" tree branch and it's hard to detangle yourself from that one.

I hate making plans. I have to make plans. I am actually the most devout user of a day planner you'll meet, but thats for writing down things guaranteed to happen. Papers due, debate tournaments, work schedule. I guess that's the double sword. I want to know when things are going to happen and how and I like to plan things out, but it seems that anytime I get a wild hair to make plans out of the blue and surprise someone with them it all goes to shit. They fall apart and I'm stuck here-typing out of angered frustration on my computer. What can you do, right? You can not take the initiative. You can sit back and wait for others to call you. You can make them come to you. But with what? Your charming wit? Your engaging personality? And when noone calls and nothing happens down you fall. It is a slippery slope. Good luck getting stuck on the fuck everything branch. At least if it snags your shirt or underwear you have less ground to cover going back up.